国产午夜亚洲精品AⅤ

Chapter 205

In truth, I also didn’t think it was completely impossible. But I had considered it from the perspective of Baalier, not Reinhart.

However, Charlotte was saying that her marrying Reinhart, not Baalier, was not an impossible scenario.

Seeing my bewilderment, Charlotte narrowed her eyes and looked at me.

“What’s this? Do you dislike me that much? Do you really find me that intolerable?”

“N-No, it’s not that! It’s just... You springing this on me all of a sudden threw me off!”

‘Isn’t it weird to not be surprised if someone suddenly said, “I might marry you” to your face?’

“So it’s not that you dislike me? Then does that mean you like me?”

“Wh-Why are you doing this to me...?”

Since I said I didn’t dislike her, it had to mean I liked her...

‘What kind of answer are you expecting from me?’

Charlotte clicked her tongue.

“In the end, you can’t say you like me, huh. You really are a strange one. What’s so bad about me?”

“Please, please. I feel like I’m going crazy. No matter what I say, it feels like a trap, so I can’t say anything.”

“Hmph, alright. I’ll stop bothering you.”

Seeing me sweating nervously, Charlotte grinned so wide that she seemed to be squinting.

“It’s just... you know... I may not know your thoughts and feelings, but I know mine, right?”

“Right.”

Charlotte said she’d imagined how a future in which we would get married would come to pass. She couldn’t know my thoughts, but she could contemplate her own, and her thoughts had led her down that road.

“We share secrets, you and I. Because of that, I might end up relying on you emotionally, and over time, I might come to like you... I’ve thought about it.”

The matter concerning Baalier... That was our only secret, as I was the one directly delivering the letters.

But all considered, I was merely the contact person. Charlotte’s true emotional dependence wasn’t on Reinhart, but on Baalier. So why would she rely on me and possibly come to like me?

“... Not that child?”

As if she expected me to say that, Charlotte smiled at me.

“The letters. You don’t need to send them anymore.”

It was the saddest smile I’d ever seen.

*

“I... I’ve been too selfish until now. While you’ve been risking your safety, I never once thought about how dangerous it must be for you, or how you must have felt. I know you’re caught between Vertus and me, and it must be burdensome. It might even be frightening. I never considered that.

“I took too many things for granted, with just a single ‘Thank you’ in return.

“I’m sorry, Reinhart. It’s not like I believed I had the right to demand that from you just because I’m a princess.

“You might have followed my orders begrudgingly, thinking you’d lose your club members and your family if you refused, and I never thought about that. You might have carried those worries, but I never considered it.

“As someone who asked you to take on such dangerous tasks, I should have considered what risks you’d be taking and whether it was burdensome or scary for you. But I didn’t.

“This is all my fault and negligence, Reinhart. I think I was too preoccupied with my own sadness, and so I thought of you as a kind person who was helping me out of goodwill. I never considered what you were thinking or how you genuinely felt about my requests.

“You’re not my subordinate.

“I’m not drawing a line and saying you can’t be my subordinate, but I’m saying it because it’s true. You’re in a position where you have to navigate between me and Vertus, and the only reason you’re involved in this dangerous balancing act is because of my single request.

“It’d be better for you to simply be a member of Class A, on Vertus’s side, but because of my selfishness, you have to perform this dangerous balancing act.

“I put you in danger and made you suffer. And I acted as if I’d repaid all my debts to you with a mere thank you.

“You have no reason to help me. What I’ve done to you thus far is nothing more than coercion.

“So, Reinhart, I’m sorry for everything up until now.

“You don’t need to send the letters anymore. I’ve already received a lot from you. So step down from this dangerous tightrope. It’s time for you to choose a side.

“Go ahead and side with Vertus. I won’t feel hurt by it, and I don’t have the right to feel that way. If you stand with me, you become Vertus’s enemy. But even if you stand with Vertus, I won’t become your enemy.”

Charlotte finished speaking and looked at me intently. This wasn’t a conclusion she’d come to after thinking about the possibility of marriage or anything like that.

The letters...

The burden of delivering them was something Charlotte hadn’t considered until now—a burden that had only just dawned on her, which caused her to seem increasingly awkward around me.

But it wasn’t really awkwardness... It was guilt.

For some reason, Charlotte had reached the conclusion that it was unfair to burden me with delivering the letters and was now saying I didn’t have to continue with it.

“So... from now on, you’ll have someone else deliver them?” I asked.

That meant someone else would have to visit Eleris instead of me. It wasn’t impossible, but it would complicate things.

However, Charlotte shook her head.

“No, I won’t be sending letters anymore.”

That was an entirely unexpected response.

“You didn’t know, did you?” she said. “The only ones who know about that child are you, me, and that mage. Just the three of us.”

“...”

“I haven’t told anyone else, even my people. And now, I can’t tell them for other reasons anyway.”

If I didn’t deliver the letters, Charlotte would have to deliver them herself.

“So... what are you planning to do?”

“I’m not going to communicate with him anymore.”

When Charlotte called me over the communicator, her voice had carried a tone of resolve. It wasn’t to have a heart-to-heart with me.

She had decided not to keep in touch with Baalier anymore.

In order to maintain secrecy, Charlotte hadn’t told her people about Baalier’s whereabouts. Initially, it was better if fewer people knew, but now, for whatever other reason, she couldn’t tell them even if she wanted to.

Pretending to deliver letters and responding to them myself had been a constant source of guilt.

I wouldn’t have to write those painful replies anymore, and that was what I wanted too.

“So, there’s no need for you to take any more risks.”

But if her reason was because she feared for my safety, or out of guilt for forcing me into unfair situations, then... there was no need for her to do that.

She didn’t need to forcefully cut ties with such a sad expression.

“Do you still not know me?”

“... What?”

Though I usually spoke to her in a softer tone, I chose to be rougher this time. It was the kind of tone I’d take when berating someone while in a bad mood.

It was the voice of the rough, delinquent Reinhart.

“If I think something’s bullshit, I’ll just say it’s bullshit and refuse.”

“...”

Charlotte seemed taken aback by my sudden harshness. She hadn’t expected this reaction.

Yes, everyone knew Reinhart as a crazy guy. If something didn’t go my way, I got pissed, and if someone treated me like crap, I’d demand to know why. It didn’t matter who the other person was.

Had she forgotten that? For the first time, I spoke harshly to Charlotte.

“If I thought your request was bullshit, I would’ve said so. Did I ever do that?”

“... No, you didn’t.”

“Exactly. I did it because I wanted to.”

Charlotte’s eyes widened.

“I say whatever comes to mind and do whatever I want. There are no exceptions, not even for you.”

‘Well... Maybe there are some exceptions for Charlotte... and Vertus...’

Right now, though, I had to speak in this way.

“I did it because I wanted to. If I didn’t want to, I wouldn’t have done it. So your worry and guilt are completely unnecessary.”

Tears started welling up in Charlotte’s eyes, growing more visible.

“So, if you have letters in the future you wish to send, don’t waste time on unnecessary thoughts. Just think about one thing. Whether you want to send them, or whether you don’t. It isn’t so hard to deliver a piece of paper.”

Tears started to roll down Charlotte’s cheeks, yet she looked at me with a faint, helpless smile. She was smiling while crying.

“Yes... as expected, that’s what you’d say.”

Had she anticipated this outcome? Did she know I would respond like this? She dabbed her flowing tears with a handkerchief.

“It’s okay. You don’t need to deliver the letters anymore,” she said, her eyes still sad.

My circumstances aside, it seemed she had already made up her mind regarding Baalier.

“Is it rude... to ask why?”

“... It’s not rude, but it’s a difficult matter to explain.”

Charlotte looked at me and bowed slightly. I was surprised; I didn’t expect her to act like that.

“Thank you so much, Reinhart. Truly.”

I no longer had to deliver Charlotte’s letters.

I no longer had to writhe in agony, crafting responses filled with lies.

But seeing Charlotte struggle to endure her sadness was more painful to me than any of that.

And yet, there were no words I could offer to console her.

*

Although Charlotte didn’t break into full sobs, tears fell silently down her cheeks, and she wiped them away with her handkerchief. Only after some time did she regain her composure and look at me with an awkward smile.

“Sorry, it seems I always show you my weakest moments.”

“I consider it a privilege.”

Being someone with whom the princess showed her vulnerable side wasn’t a bad title to have.

“Anyway, that’s my story. There will be no more letters to deliver, so you don’t have to walk the tightrope between me and Vertus anymore.”

Charlotte had said she wouldn’t resent me or consider me an enemy if I sided with Vertus. Thinking back, my involvement with Charlotte had begun because of her request. Without the letters, there was no reason for me to have additional dealings with her.

In essence, Charlotte was letting me go.

Or rather...

“So, are you saying we should stop acknowledging each other from now on?”

“That’s... not exactly what I meant...”

Charlotte looked a bit taken aback at my sudden statement.

“Kinda makes me feel sad, hearing that, you know?”

“Uh, what?”

When I expressed my feelings directly, Charlotte seemed even more flustered.

“Sure, I hate being caught between you and Vertus, but if you just say it’s over and I should side with Vertus, it makes me feel like you really were just using me. Doesn’t it?”

“... Is that how it works?”

“I thought we were friends, and I helped you out because we’re friends.”

“F-Friends?”

“What’s with that surprised reaction? Did you actually think of me as just some underling?”

“N-No, absolutely not! That’s not it at all!”

Charlotte’s face turned red and she shook her head vigorously. It’s funny; I always felt like I had to tread carefully around her, but now that she was feeling guilty, she seemed unsure of how to handle my straightforward attitude.

Perhaps the tables had turned.

Even when I spoke harshly, Charlotte was struggling, unsure of how to respond.

“So, are we friends or not?” I asked with a grin.

“Uh... Umm...”

Charlotte’s face turned even redder, and her lips trembled. She either seemed to find it unbearably embarrassing for her to admit it, or she found it absurd that she was even in such a situation.

“Are we friends or not?”

“That... that... uh...”

This was the kind of phrase I’d use to pressure someone or when picking a fight. Like when I butted heads with Kaier.

In the second semester, I could use this phrase even with the princess. The specific context was different, but still.

‘Friends or not!?’

“Y-Yes, we are...”

Charlotte, either out of embarrassment or some other feeling, nodded slightly, her face still flushed.

“So, it’s perfectly natural to ask friends for favors and to have conversations with them when you run into each other. Don’t overthink it.”

“...”

“You’re too smart for your own good sometimes. That can be a problem too.”

If you tried hard enough, you could always interpret situations in the worst possible light.

What I’d done out of friendship, Charlotte had thought about way too much, until she managed to convince herself that she’d burdened me with a great wrong.

Overthinking could be a problem.

Of course, I was guilty of it at times as well.

Hadn’t I come up with all sorts of bizarre scenarios to explain why she seemed to be avoiding me? As it turned out, the reality was completely different.

Both Charlotte and I had thought into our situations too much and made various assumptions.

And we had both been wrong.

In the end, honest conversation was what was required to get to the truth. Charlotte seemed a bit stunned by my remark that her intelligence was sometimes a problem.

She took a deep breath, and her face slowly returned to its normal color.

“Okay, since we’re friends, let me ask you something,” she said with a mischievous smile.

“Sure, what is it?”

“Is Vertus also your friend?”

“... Huh?”

Hit with such an unexpected question at such an unexpected time, I couldn’t help but feel taken aback.

“Is Vertus a friend too?”

“... Uh... Well... I’d like to think so, but...”

Were Vertus and I truly friends? Charlotte seems to think so, but I could never really tell with Vertus. Charlotte tilted her head slightly and gave me a curious smile.

“Maybe you think of Vertus as closer to you than me?”

She was smiling, but there was an edge to it that made me feel uneasy.

‘Did she really think I was closer to Vertus? That’s absolutely not the case! Sure, Vertus surprised me recently, but if I had to choose, it would be you!

‘Vertus wasn’t just trying to kill you; he was trying to kill me too!’

“No, no! It’s not like that! Why would you think that?”

“Then why did you ask Vertus for help with your club’s new venture and not me?”

‘Oh.’

That question made my brain freeze.

‘So this is all because of that! Whether Vertus told her or she found out otherwise, she found out!’

“Was it because you found me unreliable, or you thought Vertus would be able to handle it better? Or was it just because you’re closer to him?”

Charlotte looked at me intently. ‘Why did you ask Vertus instead of me? Are we not friends? If so, does that mean Vertus is even more of a friend to you?’ her eyes were probing, demanding an answer.

‘Is she upset because of that? No way... did she think about that and come to the conclusion that I might dislike or even fear her?’

“W-Well, the thing is... given the circumstances...”

“Circumstances? What circumstances?”

“Well, you see, right after Dettomorian said we’d get married, if I suddenly came to you with that request, it’d be... awkward, don’t you think?”

“Oh.”

Charlotte seemed to realize the situation, and understood why I couldn’t bring up that request at that time.

Whether I acted like I cared about it or not, I couldn’t approach her with that request at such an awkward time.

“...”

“...”

Both of our faces turned red. We had come full circle back to the initial topic, Dettomorian’s prophecy.

We stayed silent for a while, our faces flushed.

Finally, Charlotte broke the silence, stammering slightly.

“... But honestly, just one more thing.”

“... What is it?”

Charlotte looked at me and asked bluntly, “Am I not good enough?”

“... What?”

“That is, am I not attractive enough?”

“W-Why are you asking such a thing!?”

“Because you seem to react so negatively all the time! Shouldn’t you be grateful? Hey, I know Ellen Artorius is amazing, but am I so much less so? Sure, there are a few areas where she might surpass me, but I have many good points too!”

“Why are you bringing her up all of a sudden?”

“Anyway, am I not good enough? Just give me a straight answer! Yes or no?!”

Yes or no. The very question I’d asked her earlier was being thrown back at me. We had been discussing serious issues just a moment ago, but why had the conversation suddenly turned in this direction after our declaration of friendship?

“Yes! You’re attractive! I should consider myself lucky!”

“... Hearing it like that makes it sound like you’re just saying what I want to hear.”

“... What do you want from me?”

“... I don’t know.”

Charlotte seemed even more dejected, her expression turning sour as she realized my answer didn’t bring her any satisfaction.

Charlotte stretched with a grim expression and let out a sigh.

“Friends, huh...”

“...”

Charlotte looked at me and gave a small chuckle.

“Congratulations, Reinhart.”

“Congratulations for what?”

“For becoming the second friend of the Imperial Princess of Gradias.”

It seemed like she got along with everyone in Class B, but it seemed she had drawn a line in her heart. Being a true friend had to carry significant weight for her.

I already knew who the first friend was, and it seemed like I’d become the second.

So, I was effectively Charlotte’s only new friend. Charlotte looked at me with a mischievous grin as she furrowed her brow.

“Consider it an honor.”

“Oh, yes, yes, it’s quite an honor. Thank you so much for that,” I said sarcastically.

“You’re becoming more comfortable around me, which I suppose is a good sign, but it’s also a bit irritating.”

Charlotte turned her gaze to the fish swimming in the pond.

The hidden sadness within her was no longer visible on her face.

“Let’s do our best. At everything.”

“Yeah.”

‘I don’t know exactly what we’re supposed to do well at.

But whatever it is, let’s do it well.’

Her words sounded oddly comforting.