另类小说第1页综合

Countless thoughts swam around in her mind as the feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy plagued her.

No matter how much she wanted to convince herself, it simply won\'t disappear.

A permanent shadow in her mind, lingering, watching, smirking.

For the brief moment when she felt proud of the skill she created, that pride was instantly shattered with Alice finding new ways of improving.

Glancing up at the sky, Selen took a deep breath and sighed.

"Why am I even trying?" She asked herself with a bitter smile.

No matter what she does, no matter what she tries, she simply can\'t keep up.

Frustration.

Gritting her teeth, tears began to form in her eyes as Selen wiped it away with her sleeve.

Closing her eyes, she tried her best to calm her emotions. A simple task considering what she had to go through before.

Reaching back with her hand, she traced the scars that painted her back and a burning fury rose up in her heart once more.

However, this fury was quickly dosed once she remembered the power of the hybrids. The Zenia family could have made hundreds of these abominations. She was simply a failed product that did slightly better than the rest.

Selen could still remember the disappointed gazes of the scholars after she failed to truly adapt to Alice\'s blood.

While she\'s gained some form of resistance, it was still far too lacking.

To them, Alice is the perfect specimen of what they\'ve been striving for. They only needed a bit more work before she was \'perfect\'.

But she escaped.

Thinking about this, a self-mocking smile appeared on her face.

\'It\'s to be expected. I\'m just a failed product after all, how can I even dream about catching up with the original.\'

###

\'Shouldn\'t you go after Selen? She didn\'t look well.\' Alyss asked while laying upside down on her throne.

\'Even if I go, I\'m not sure what to say to her.\' Alice sighed.

Hugging her knees, she glanced at the floor in contemplation. This has been something that\'s happened with both Ria and Selen now. Their gazes of uncertainty as she improves at a rapid pace.

\'I suppose that\'s true. She might even take it as pity which will be the opposite result of what you want.\' Alyss scratched her hair.

It wasn\'t going to be an easy issue to resolve considering it\'s an issue regarding the mental state. There\'s only so much help that they can give Selen and the rest she has to resolve herself.

\'It is wrong of me to improve so quickly?\'

For her goals, she needed to be stronger. But the faster and stronger she gets, the more it seems like she\'s pushing the people around her away. To do things solo.

Even though she had already told herself that she had to keep moving forward… Seeing her friends drift away…

It hurts.

Biting her lip, Alice clutched her chest in pain as tears welled up in the corner of her eyes.

Seeing her twin like this, Alyss gave her a hug from behind.

She didn\'t have the answer to this question either.

Between the two of them, Alice was the more unstable one when it came to emotions. Despite her power and the brutality of her actions, she\'s someone who\'ll laugh, get angry and become sad like everyone else.

She\'s still just a girl on the inside.

Watching this, Cayla was silent.

Alice\'s fate was going to be a lonely one. Upon gathering all the relics, she had already solidified herself as the future ruler of the Abyss. The next generation queen and Goddess.

Not only that, but her body is a product of Nyer\'s designs. A fated clash was unavoidable thus she had to get power in order to protect herself.

She couldn\'t hold herself back.

But even so… Cayla hoped that Alice could spend her time as a normal girl before any of that happened. Seeing her master like this broke her heart as she wished she could give her the answers she desired.

[Where are you Allura… Your daughter needs some comforting.] Cayla sighed inwardly.

This loneliness, perhaps only those at the top could relate to.

Both Allura and Kaden had lived countless years, reached the pinnacle of strength and experienced partings. They may have taught her how to fight and survive, but she still needed guidance as a human.

###

Sitting by a bench, Selen held a bottle of juice in her hand as she slumped back and wondered why she was even doing all of this.

No matter how much she tries, the day goes on regardless. The morning come and go without care or worry about what the humans experience.

"Are you feeling alright?" A familiar voice rang out as Selen glanced back and saw Egil standing behind her bench. "I\'m fi- Nah never mind. I\'m feeling a bit sh*tty right now." Selen originally planned to put up a brave front but anyone could tell she wasn\'t doing great right now.

"Want to talk about it?" Egil asked, jumping over the bench and sat down next to her.

"Dunno. Want to get something to drink first?" Selen offered.

"If you\'re offering I won\'t reject."

Grabbing a bottle of juice for Egil as well, the two sat down on the same bench.

"So what\'s been on your mind?"

". . .Have… have you ever thought about how no matter what you did, it was futile?" Selen asked, causing Egil to choke on his drink.

"Hmm… Yep, I have. The thought never leaves my mind." Egil chuckled, taking another sip.

"How do you deal with it?"

"I can only assume this is about Alice, unless I\'m wrong. I\'ve never told you about my childhood have I?" Egil scratched his chin.

"No you haven\'t."

"I see…" Leaning back for a moment, Egil closed his eyes before a smile appeared on his face.

"You know about my physique right? I wasn\'t always this bulky. In fact, I wasn\'t even supposed to grow this much you know?

"I was quite the shrimp growing up. I wouldn\'t say malnourished since my mother made sure I was fed. But rather I was born sickly and weak. I was always jealous of those who could run around and smile like nothing because I could not do the same.

"My father, however, was a proud warrior with a strong physique. He simply couldn\'t understand how his genes created such a shrimp like me and blamed it on my mother. The two didn\'t have a single peaceful day after I was born." Egil smiled bitterly while swirling the juice in his hands.

"I couldn\'t take it anymore. I was jealous of the people around me, jealous of my father and you could even say I was resentful of my mother at one point. I believed my father\'s words saying that my mother was the cause of my weakness. I said some pretty nasty things to her back then."

Clenching his fist, Egil swung his head back and drank a mouthful of juice.

"So I cheated. I couldn\'t change the weakness of my body so I decided to cheat. I drank Abyss Blood and modified my body in order to become \'healthy and strong\'. You know how us northerners are with our perception of the Abyss." Egil sighed while looking up at the sky.

"You can imagine how my father treated me afterwards. Hurling all kinds of words my way while the people I was jealous of before called me a monster. I became quite hateful after that you know? I began to fight everyone who said anything bad about me and refused to play nice with my teammates. That\'s how I got my poor reputation ahaha." Egil scratched the back of his head.

"But my mother never gave up on me. The only thing she cared about was who I was on the inside. I may have walked off the right path but she guided me back."

While Selen\'s situation may be different, he\'ll try his best to help her. Just like how his mother helped him get over his jealousy and inferiority, he\'ll dispel the doubts in her mind.

###

\'Sorry…\' Alice mumbled, wiping her tears away. The corners of her eyes and nose were red and swollen.

\'Don\'t be sorry. As long as you\'re feeling better.\' Alyss waved her hand dismissively.

\'Mnm… I didn\'t think I would feel that bitter about it ahaha…\' Alice smiled sadly as Alyss scratched her cheek.

\'I\'d say it was a long time coming. If you didn\'t feel hurt or emotional, I\'ll be more worried about that instead. Just proves you\'re human like the rest of us on the inside. Not just an experiment or a product.\' She couldn\'t stand seeing her twin like this.

She wanted to see Alice bounce around happily while shopping for cutesy clothes, struggle to manage her money as she bought too much mead and laugh when she makes a breakthrough in her skills.

Alyss didn\'t want to see her twin cry.

Hearing Alyss\'s response, Alice was silent as she dwelled on the words.

To feel these emotions is to be human. She wasn\'t just a product who\'s only purpose was to fight.

Just thinking about this brought a smile to her face.

\'Thank you.\' Alice laughed.

\'Yeesh, has anyone told you that you got a goofy ass smile after crying? Tears and snot everywhere, such a brat.\' Alyss stuck out her tongue but there was a hint of relief in her eyes.

\'Shaddap! You try and smile nice after crying.\' Alice pouted.

\'Hah! I look fabulous all the time, My smile, perfect. My looks, immaculate.\' Alyss flipped her hair.

\'We look the same jackass!\'

\'This is where you\'re wrong my dear twin. It\'s all about the elegance.\' Alyss grinned.

Seeing the two arguing like nothing happened, Cayla chuckled.

Things were going to be fine in the end. After all, Alice had a caring twin by her side, comforting her, teasing her and backing her up.