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Chapter 506: Yo, Do You Feel Like Shit Today?



Chapter 506: Yo, Do You Feel Like Shit Today?

“The brightest radiance may end in a single moment, a small compromise may secure a boundless future.” Yi Pin’s prophecy had been spot on. If Shangguan Yurong had chosen to ignore his words, she might not be alive today. It was why she viewed him as her benefactor, respected him as a senior, and cherished her memories of him to this day.

Some sects received the heretical label because their core philosophy or methodologies didn’t align with the orthodoxy, but the Earthfire Palace of Demons was a demonic sect through and through. Everyone was constantly trying to deceive the other person, and everyone had a heart of stone. In their world, the concept of truth, kindness, good faith, sincerity and more were the lowest of lows, and that was a belief Shangguan Yurong shared as well.

There was an exception, however. The only time Shangguan Yurong acted wholly different from her beliefs was when she spoke of Yi Pin. When the old Taoist entered the conversation, her smile was bright, and her expression was sunny. No one else—not even Huo Linglong, her disciple—could elicit such a smile from her.

Huo Linglong returned from her memory lane and asked puzzledly, “But what happened to you, Reverend? Why are you...”

According to Shangguan Yurong, Yi Pin was a handsome, elegant and refined man whose cultivation was deeper than the sea itself. The old man before her was, well, old, but she supposed her master wasn’t exaggerating since could spot vestiges of his former looks here and there. His cultivation though? To say it was shallow would be an understatement.

“Let’s not talk about my cultivation,” Yi Pin cut her off curtly before changing the subject. “Please bring Yurong my greetings when you return to your sect.”

“Of course. I’m sure she will be very happy to hear about you.” Huo Linglong smiled.

“Oh right, I have a question, Linglong. How did you figure out that we were just pretending to be hurt just now? I thought our disguise was perfect,” Yi Pin asked.

Huo Linglong giggled at that. “And it is a pretty good disguise. The problem is that neither of you should be alive at all. There is no reason for a Vessel Augmentor and an early-stage Spirit Purifier to be able to survive the Fire God Moth and the Children of the Frost in a row, you know? That was the biggest hole in your facade.”

“Besides that, the Children of the Frost was the Stranger who showed up last night. Assuming you were hurt during the trial, you should be covered in frostbites or something, no? However, neither of you look frozen in the slightest. That is why I suspected that you were feigning weakness.”

“But of course, I couldn’t be sure that my deductions were true, which is why I chose to attack you. If I was wrong, then whatever. If I was right, then I was right. Speaking of which, I hope you won’t take offense with this junior’s actions.”

Realization struck both Ye Qing and Yi Pin. They had definitely gotten careless at the end there. “Of course not. Your master chose well, Linglong. You are as smart and accomplished as her when she was younger.”

“Ahem. Since you know Yi Pin, you can definitely rest easy now, can you not?” Ye Qing coughed. He had no idea that Yi Pin and Huo Linglong’s master were old acquaintances. In fact, it sounded like they were... very close. No wonder the old lecher dared to divulge the Earthfire Palace of Demons’ greatest secret like it was nothing.

This was a good thing, of course. There was now some actual trust in their cooperation.

As he spoke, Ye Qing blinked rapidly at Yi Pin. The fuck you’re waiting for? Help me!

Yi Pin blinked back. You sold me just now, and you want me to be your spokesperson? Dream on!

Ye Qing blinked again. We’re brothers, aren’t we? There is no wrong that we can’t settle on the spot. What if I give you a bottle of Nature’s Water?

Yi Pin arranged his features into dripping disdain. You think you can heal my wounded heart with just a bottle of Nature’s Water? Dream on!

Ye Qing blinked. Two bottles then!

Yi Pin remained unmoved.

Blink blink. Three bottles!

Yi Pin pretended he couldn’t see anything.

Ye Qing frowned deeply before gritting his teeth. Four bottles, and that’s my final offer!

Yi Pin merely scoffed at him.

In the end, Ye Qing caved to the pressure. Fine! I’ll give you five! You better not push me any further!

Finally, Yi Pin broke into a smile. Deal.

Ye Qing sighed in relief. It was the same feeling; the same formula. Thank goodness the bastard was still the same shitstain he knew.

Yi Pin took a moment to clear his throat before starting, “Ahem. Linglong? This boy may be insidious, vicious, shameless, brazen, greedy and insatiable, but he is a man of his word. I swear on my honor that he won’t reveal what happened today, and if something did go wrong, then you have my permission to seek me out and receive your due, okay?”

Ye Qing: “...”

Ye Qing didn’t feel angry when he heard this. In fact, he felt like laughing out loud. That doesn’t sound like me at all! That sounds like you, old man!

Huo Linglong ignored their interaction and giggled. “You’re my master’s benefactor, Reverend. Of course I have faith in your promise. I look forward to work with you, dearie.”

Ye Qing smirked. “Same here.”

Huo Linglong asked, “So, are we going to act now, or...?”

Ye Qing shook his head. “No. We’ll wait until tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow? Why’s that?” Huo Linglong looked puzzled.

Ye Qing’s grin widened. “Because our chances of success will be higher, of course.”

......

Another day passed, and Sun Xuanzhen was really starting to wonder if his streak of bad luck was a sign of something... unnatural.

He thought his woes were over after he pooped all day the day before yesterday, but no, it was just the beginning. For starters, he was plagued by a terrible headache the whole day yesterday. As if that wasn’t enough, yesterday’s trial was none other than the infamous Smelly Wind.

As its name implied, the Smelly Wind was an extremely smelly wind. It was a kind of stench no one had ever known until they smelled it, and it couldn’t be isolated even if one sealed their sense of smell completely.

Whenever the Smelly Wind appeared, nine out of ten households including the animals usually suffocated to death. The Smelly Wind wasn’t a Stranger, but depending on the circumstances, it could be worse than even a Disaster-class Stranger.

Not only that, he felt like the Smelly Wind was specifically targeting him for some reason. It kept blowing into his room until he felt like committing suicide. Seriously.

As if that wasn’t enough, the pills he knew could help him resist the Smelly Wind suddenly went missing, and his Strange Artifacts he brought out suddenly malfunctioned for whatever reason. After the Smelly Wind was gone, his pills reappeared, and his Strange Artifacts suddenly returned to normal. How annoying was that?

As a result, he felt both mentally and physically exhausted. He was barely aware of what was happening when he left his room to carry out his usual rounds.

He wasn’t too distracted to notice that Yue Juejiang and Huo Linglong looked just as pale and tired as him, however. Schadenfreude immediately rejuvenated him a little. Yo! Do you guys feel like shit as well?

Suddenly, Sun Xuanzhen heard Huo Linglong muttering to herself, “What on earth is going on? It’s been bad luck after bad luck recently.”

“Hmm? What did you just say?” Sun Xuanzhen had thought that something was off since the first day his luck went to shit, but now it had evolved into full blown suspicion. “Did you just say you were incredibly unlucky as of late, Fire Princess?”

“Is that a problem?” Huo Linglong looked disgruntled. “Are you happy that I’m on an unlucky streak?”

“Not at all. I’m on an unlucky streak myself,” Sun Xuanzhen said seriously.

Yue Juejiang was walking away because he was too tired for human interaction today, but he immediately returned upon hearing their conversation. “Wait a second. It’s the same for me!”

“You too?” Sun Xuanzhen frowned deeply before divulging the truth. “The day before yesterday, I had a terrible stomach ache that kept me in my room the whole day. Yesterday, I had a terrible migraine and was forced to stay inside my room again.”

Yue Juejiang exclaimed in astonishment, “I didn’t have a stomach ache or a headache, but I too didn’t leave my room for similar reasons!”

“Same here.” Huo Linglong nodded simply before blanching. “No, no! Something’s very wrong about this!”

“What is?” Sun Xuanzhen asked.

Huo Linglong answered, “Yesterday, when we left to collect the Profound Yellow Qi after the trial, did any of you sense the aura of the Profound Yellow Qi from the people?”

“... No, I don’t think so.”

“Me neither.”

“The day before yesterday, all three of us left our rooms exactly once, right? After that, we were forced to stay inside our rooms because of our bad luck, right? This means that those we weren’t able to visit should’ve absorbed their Profound Yellow Qi. In reality, not a single one of them exude its aura. Don’t you think that’s strange?”

Sun Xuanzhen figured out Huo Linglong’s meaning immediately. “You’re saying that there’s a fourth person who stole our Profound Yellow Qi.”

It would also explain why all three of them had suddenly become insanely unlucky. Someone was forcing them to stay in their rooms so they could claim all the Profound Yellow Qi for themselves.

But Yue Juejiang said, “I don’t know. There’s a chance the worms allowed the Profound Yellow Qi to disappear on its own because they’re too afraid of us, isn’t there?”

Sun Xuanzhen: “...”

Huo Linglong: “...”

Anyone with even a single brain cell in their head wouldn’t make such a stupid statement. Or was he so damaged that he sincerely believed that everyone besides his kin was retarded?

Huo Linglong pretended that she hadn’t heard Yue Juejiang and declared, “All we need to do is to question someone that neither of us had visited the day before yesterday to find out the truth. If they claim that they refined the Profound Yellow Qi or allowed it to dissipate, then I suppose we’re just overthinking this. If not, then we will know that someone was stealing our Profound Yellow Qi.”

With that said, Huo Linglong strode toward a room, and both Sun Xuanzhen and Yue Juejiang were right behind her.


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