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Chapter 13

My Heart Beats

꒦︶꒷‧₊★₊‧꒷︶꒷‧₊ଓ₊‧꒷︶꒷‧₊★₊‧꒷︶꒦

(Gabriel’s 3rd person POV)

It was a problem that emerged as the boy grew up.

“Young master. Don’t be sad, Rocky must have gone to a good place.”

“What am I supposed to be sad about?”

“Young Master? I meant Rocky, the dog that the master raised just died a while ago.”

“Yeah, I know he died, so what?”

“Oh my god.”

It wasn’t just a sword or an opponent that couldn’t penetrate the boy.

He couldn’t feel emotions; he was never attached to anything or anyone. People didn’t linger in his heart.

His mother, who always cried while holding him, didn’t make any sense to the boy.

“Can this child still be considered living? He’s not interested in anything. Will this kid ever get what he wants in this life? And lastly, will he ever love or be loved by someone?”

“Honey. Please calm down.”

“How can I calm down? This kind of power is useless – tell them to take it back! All I ask for is for them to return my child’s heart!”

(TN/N: In this part the mother talks about Gabriel’s blessing/saying who is the strongest person in the Empire, but he can’t feel any kind of emotion.)

His mother’s words of sorrow weren’t wrong after all.

Whether people laughed or cried, Gabriel was indifferent to it all.

Still, the boy was not without joy and sorrow.

Everything was just dull and blunt. It wasn’t as clear.

It just felt too awkward to laugh or cry.

Feelings like love and affection were things that only existed in fairy tales.

The most he could understand were anguish and anger.

“Don’t forget what happened today, Lord!”

“Belfius belongs only to you. Do not forgive those insolent fools!”

Even though he appeared to be humiliatingly defeated by his relatives, he persevered through these perilous times.

Eventually, the years of enduring like that came to an end.

The moment arrived when he finally became head and took over as the Duke of Belfius.

But even then, Gabriel’s heart was empty.

At that time, the adjutant, who was watching, asked with a sad face,

“Lord. Aren’t you happy?”

“Why? Don’t you understand me well?”

“No, on the contrary, I think that our Lord is way cooler and better. However…”

“However?”

“Personally, I feel sad.”

Such was Gabriel.

There were a lot of things around him that he lacked interest towards, and one of them was the arranged marriage that he has with Hillington.

For him, it was annoying and bothersome, like something that needed to be cleaned up.

So he devised a trick. By stealing the marriage token, he could completely sever the cumbersome connection with Hillington and use it against them.

Since he was about to be called to fight in the impending Imperial War, if he stole the proof of engagement, Hillington would have no other choice but to look for another marriage partner.

He thought it was that simple.

Until last night, when he snuck inside the Hillington mansion.

‘Why are there so many layers of protective magic here?’

He clicked his tongue and managed to break through the defense barrier before entering the Hillington mansion.

And he began to move towards the place where the token might have been.

Gabriel had already reached the level where he was invisible to the human eye and able to pass the knights unseen. He moved as if the distance were getting shorter every time he took off.

At one point, while he continued to move at that pace, something sparkling appeared in his peripheral vision.

‘What is that?’

‘It was definitely someone.’

If he passed by like this, they would undoubtedly never meet.

‘…….’

And yet, Gabriel forgot that he was supposed to be moving stealthily and abruptly stopped.

‘Wait, what?’

Strangely, Gabriel couldn’t advance at all.

It was as if he had become a statue, His body refused to listen.

He suddenly felt desperate for no apparent reason, and he felt that someone was startled by his appearance and attempted to run away.

‘No.’

‘Please don’t go.’

Gabriel was really surprised by the emotions he felt that resembled nervousness.

‘Why do I feel like this?’

Then, his body started to move.

He immediately chased that person. He completely forgot his purpose of stealing the token, and he grabbed her shoulder and spun her towards him.

It was a really stupid decision.

He even asked,

“Who are you?”

Gabriel thought that the whole process was completely absurd.

‘Yes, this may be a trick.’

‘It’s clear that this girl did it.’

While thinking like that, the opponent stared at him.

A white face was visible through her swaying and messy, shiny silver hair.

And something changed, as if someone had clicked and pressed a trigger in Gabriel’s heart.

“…….”

“…….”

The opponent was just an ordinary girl.

She must have been surprised by his appearance, but the person was quietly looking at him, perhaps because she had a calm personality.

The girl had a pretty face like a doll. Gabriel wasn’t even interested in any human being, but somehow this girl was different.

The moment their eyes met, he felt like something was piercing his heart.

Gabriel clenched his fists.

It was an unbearable sensation.

‘Ugh.’

If there are things he never felt before that hit him all at once, what will happen to his heart?

He felt an overload in his dull heart. It thumped like it was going to explode.

‘Ugh!’

After the shock, like being struck by lightning, he couldn’t think of what to do next.

Because he collapsed afterwards.

His heart was beating like it was about to explode, and then Gabriel suddenly stopped breathing.

‘I thought I’d die like that.’

‘Ah…….’

When he woke up again, someone was muttering next to him.

What appears to be a blurred vision of a girl with a disturbed complexion. She’s the one that he saw, just before he fell down.

Ah, I understand.

‘Did she save me?’

Gabriel thought blankly.

‘That hair must definitely be-’

Hillington’s first child.

He suddenly felt joy and happiness.

‘Strange.’

As soon as he saw the girl, his heart began to beat as if it was his first time feeling it.

‘I don’t understand.’

The surrounding landscape, which had been in all achromatic colors, began to shine beautifully with all kinds of colors as if it had bloomed splendidly.

‘What is this feeling?’

The girl’s bright silver hair and white face, her cheeks glowing deep red from struggling, her breath that spread through the night air, and her vivid red eyes.

Without knowing why, Gabriel hastily gathered all the pieces of the scene into his memory.

‘I wanted to speak, but my tongue wouldn’t move.’

And there was no chance.

Because the girl pushed me into a dog hole without hesitation.

‘Not yet.’

He lost consciousness again.

When he opened his eyes again, the place had already changed.

“Ugh.”

“My lord! Are you awake?”

Gabriel faced the knights with desperate faces surrounding him.

“My lord, no, just how did this happen? Did something happen inside? Have you been attacked, my lord? And what’s wrong with your face?”

“What?”

Gabriel didn’t know that his face was as red as a tomato.

He slowly placed his hand on his heart.

It felt very unfamiliar with the continuous beating, it was so fast as if it were about to explode. His hands and feet were trembling, and he felt like he was walking on soft and fluffy clouds.

The boy had finally grown up.

He used to think that thinking of someone was just a complete waste of his time.

Still, for some reason, it wouldn’t be bad to look at her all day.

Gabriel placed his hand on his chest and shook his head.

‘What is this sensation that I’m feeling now?’

‘What kind of feeling is this?’

‘Am I going crazy?’

The angel…

“Yes?”

“There was an angel.”

“What?”

Gabriel, who had taken a deep breath for a moment and organized his thoughts, said as he looked at the knights who were muttering as if their master was going crazy.

“I’m going to change my plan.”

“How do you plan to change it?”

“The Hillington’s….”

For some reason, he suddenly felt very shy to say these words.

‘Ah, so this is what shyness was like.’

Gabriel smiled, rubbing his heart once again.

“I’ve decided to marry their first child.”

“….What?”

-ˏˋ ━━━━━━ ʚ ɞ ━━━━━━ ˊˎ-

(Gabriel’s POV)

When I finally finished reminiscing about the past event and opened my eyes, I saw my adjutant with a worried face.

“Everything happened so fast, the sudden proposal of marriage…. My lord, we are all aware of it, but everyone is asking and wondering what’s your purpose.”

“Yeah, I guess so. But…”

The adjutant waited patiently for my answer. Then I finally grinned.

“I don’t know to be honest. So don’t ask me any more questions, okay? Because I don’t know how to answer you as well as why I did it.”

Yes, it was a sudden impulse.

The adjutant, who looked at me as if I was going crazy, had a strangely distorted face.

“……My lord, you suddenly became strange for some reason in just a matter of days.”

“Like I’ve been struck by lightning?”

“Yeah, exactly.”

Gabriel smirked.

“Well, maybe our first meeting was a bolt from the blue.”

(TN/N: A bolt from the blue is a metaphorical phrase referring to a lightning bolt suddenly coming from a clear sky, like something that you wouldn’t expect to happen.)

Because I almost died.

“Ha? What are you talking about?”

I was really curious about Hillington’s first child. It was like I always wanted to be by her side and approach her all the time.

I didn’t know why, but this is the first time that I desired someone or something, and I couldn’t help but helplessly want it.

(3rd Person POV)

The youngest Duke in history, Duke of Belfius, was considered to have the blessing of powerful words and monstrous strength. Having made up his mind, there was definitely nothing that could stop him from doing what he wanted.

Later, Gabriel finished the process as quickly as lightning.

He visited the emperor first and made sure of his answer.

However, the Emperor who initially requested the marriage proposal, was skeptical when Gabriel suddenly said that he would do it.

“Why did you suddenly change your mind, Gabriel?”

“There is a valid reason, Your Majesty.”

It wasn’t for any political reason the Emperor thought, but he didn’t feel the need to explain it.

“We’ll proceed as you said.”

After he heard that one sentence, he immediately turned his back. Hearing the Emperor’s chuckles, he immediately hardened his heart.

‘There’s not enough time.’

‘I have to leave for the war.’

The battlefield, which he was supposed to leave for casually, has now turned into something  cumbersome.

Feeling bitter, he instructed his subordinates to go straight to the Hillington residence.

‘I knew that I had to follow a more careful and thoughtful procedure. But my mind and my heart played separately.

Gabriel was very curious.

‘What did that night mean to that girl? She must have felt the same sensation that I experience. Like the pounding of the heart?’

‘Does she want to marry me too?’

‘But what if the girl refuses my offer?’

‘No, think positive.’

His eyelids trembled.

“I think I’m going to die.”

“What?”

Somehow Gabriel felt like he was about to cry.

Thinking of Hildea, who was so cold today, he felt like his endless confidence was abating.

He was confident in the whole process, but when he was in front of Hildea, he felt so small that it was ridiculous.

His heart ached when he remembered that Hildea’s face wasn’t very bright until the end of the conversation.

‘Does she hate me?’

“It’s a mess.”

“My Lord…”

“I’ll say it again. That there’s no other reason. It’s not about family benefits or hidden agenda. It’s just that I want to get married.”

“…Oh, my God. Lord, don’t tell me…”

‘I just wish that I had made a better first impression on her.’

“Are you in love?”

TO BE CONTINUED….