Chapter 198 - The Gate
Darkness flooded Li\'s vision, and he felt an intense sense of disorientation, as if he was falling but he did not know in what direction. It felt exactly like the same sense of loss of control as that which he felt when he first came into this world, when he stepped into that void in what he thought was a game glitch.
He fell. For a long time, or a short time? He could not tell. He did not know how time was passing. He did not know what he was. He tried to move his body, but nothing moved. He did not even know if he even had a body.
There was only an infinitely stretching darkness, and in the midst of this void, there was only the thin speck of his lonely consciousness.
"The gate…"
A voice echoed through the darkness. It was so very faint. A mere whisper. It sounded so faint, so weak, as if uttered an unimaginable distance away.
"The gate…"
It became louder, a little closer, but still so very far away.
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A different voice. Much louder. Much closer. Right next to Li, or rather, was that voice within him? Inside of his consciousness? He could not tell.
What did it say? He could not tell. It sounded garbled, so utterly alien and distorted in a way that it was incomprehensible to him.
A brief pause. Or was it long? He could not tell.
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"Who are you?" said Li. He was surprised his voice could even project, but in a way, he had an instinctive understanding that this was the mystery entity\'s doing.
"I am All in One. One in All. The Boundary. The Threshold. One who is Open. One who is Closed. The Gate and the Key. I am you. You are me."
The voice was completely comprehensible now, and it gained a human tone. It was a long, droning male voice, not very deep and completely devoid of any intonation or inflection, like an alien trying to pilot human vocal cords.
The way it spoke so slowly, drawing out each word, it felt like time was becoming stretched out, its surprisingly fragile fabric warping and twisting as every word was uttered.
In a way, the voice was soothing, welcoming. Beckoning.
In the eternal darkness, thirteen points of light flickered in front of Li\'s consciousness. They wavered, and then expanded, forming into thirteen circular doorways that orbited around each other in complicated and chaotic patterns. Each doorway was of a different color, and the light they emitted was never constant, always flickering and shimmering and wavering like desert mirages.
"What does that even mean?" said Li. "I am…you?"
"Yes."
Li waited for a further explanation, but he did not find one. He did not sense any hostility from this voice. In fact, he actually felt some measure of comfort in it. It felt so very familiar, and yet he had never before heard it.
"What do you mean by that? What is this place?"
"This place is you. My form is true darkness incarnate. I am all that lies between the edges of the cosmic and the Outer. You are me, thus, you too, are darkness incarnate. This sprawling darkness is you.
What you truly are. Not the puppets and dolls that you pretend to be."
Li attempted to comprehend what this entity\'s words meant for him, but he could not find any real answer for now.
"I sense confusion. You hear my words, and you hear abstraction. Incomprehension. That is natural. You are yet to become. But that is not why you have come here. You have come here for direction."
"Not direction. Control. ," said Li. He wanted to ask more questions about the entity\'s previous words, but he found that he could not. His questioning was limited to what was allowed within the rules of this space. "Control over power I know that I have."
"Control? No. We do not control power. We are power. There is no control, only movement. Direction. You seek to know where you will move. Your direction. I can grant you that. I can grant you choices."
The thirteen orbs suddenly froze, and then they expanded away from each other, forming a hollow matrix that pulsated aberrantly in geometric patterns and movements that seemed impossible. In the hollow of the matrix, imagery began to form, showing Li, surprisingly, himself.
His normal, human self-back in his past world. He was standing in the rain in his business casual suit. A cleantech mask was on his face, the advanced filtration system letting out an occasional beep as it filtered out unclean air. He was looking down at his parents\' graves, his eyes closed as they usually were when he visited to say hello them and wish them well.
The entity spoke again: "I am love. I am pain. I am compassion. I am cruelty. I pitied you. Your miserable, insignificant, meaningless existence, and thus-,"
The image in the matrix changed. This time, it was Li in the new world. He was in the farm, smiling as he beheld the sun with Old Thane after a day of hard work. Tia was standing next to him, holding his hand.
"You became something more."
"You\'re the one that transported me into this world?" said Li. "You\'re the voice that called out for my help?"
"I hear every prayer. I hear every curse. But I do not pray. I do not curse.
No, those were the prayers of little ones in the world you now reside in. Little ones that tapped into the flow of my power, our power, wishing with their prayers and sacrificed lives so desperately to influence its direction."
"That wasn\'t how I understood it," said Li, recalling Alexei\'s words. The Elves had likely been the ones to summon him, and they had done so through the power of Source Magic. "I was brought here with source magic. At the least, that was my understanding of it."
"A limited understanding. I have told you. We are power. What the little ones call the Source is but a droplet of the infinity that we comprise.
So many little ones throughout so very many worlds pray for those infinitesimally small droplets. Sometimes, the worlds themselves pray, and sometimes, I answer. But enough of this. You must now choose your direction. How you will flow, for without direction, you are formless, and formless, you are nothing."
The thirteen orbs broke their formation, and the images they projected disappeared. They instead began to hover around Li. Thirteen voices all spoke to Li simultaneously, sounding like the mixture of countless voices of all kinds male and female, human and alien.
"I am Chaos. I am Order. I am the Gate that seals off the Outer from unleashing itself upon all realities, all worlds. But I am also the Key that can bring forth the Outer into the Inner, marking the beginning of the Crawling Chaos that heralds the end of all things.
I raze entire civilizations. Slaughter empires so vast they stretch across stars. Yet I also plant happiness within sorrowful hearts. Build up worlds teeming with life. I am power, you are power, and power has direction.
To flow for Chaos.
Or to flow for Order."
"The gate…the gate…," came the pitifully weak voice from before.
The thirteen orbs expanded out and away from Li, revealing a figure crawling its way through the darkness towards Li.
It was the corpse of the hero, except the girl was still alive. She was a crawling torso, her body severed in half at the waist. Her entrails dragged behind her like tails as she slowly pushed her way forwards with thin, bony hands. Her dirt and blood stained face had tears streaming down them as she affixed a desperate gaze not to the thirteen orbs, but to Li.
"Please," said the girl as she reached out to Li, her fingers clawing at the darkness.
"Chaos. Order. Hate. Love. Cruelty. Pity," droned on the entity. "Choose. And flow."
Li found that he now had a physical body. Or some semblance of it. He could merely perceive himself as a hand. A floating, disembodied, black hand. One that looked strikingly familiar to the Dark beast hand.
At that moment, as he wrapped his dark fingers around the girl\'s own little hand, a hand that felt so very much like Tia\'s, he chose what he felt was right to him.