Chapter 69 - I Don't Want You To Lose Yourself Forever
"What was the Crown Princess talking about?"
Queen Lorey raised a brow when she heard the unusual cold voice of her husband the King. She even wondered if she heard him wrong!
"What do you mean?" she asked, trying her best to act normal.
King Regan who was turning his back at his wife, turned around to face her. His cold expression surprised the Queen as he never behaved like this before.
"I\'m not a fool, Lorey. I understand what the Crown Princess was saying. What did you do this time?" the King asked. Though he was more than disappointed, he tried his best not to raise his voice.
This time? Why did he talked like... the Queen\'s eyes grew wide when something crossed her mind. Did he know all along? He knew what she did all those years yet... he never talked about it?!
"I know everything. I know the bad atmosphere between you and Arin. I think it\'s more than time for you to stop."
The King just proved that she was right and it made her tight-lipped. What should she say? When she glanced at his cold eyes which were more than foreign for her, she nervously clenched her fingers.
"Have I ever treated Morin indifferently? Do you ever recall me discriminate him from Arin?" King Regan asked and shook his head. "I love them the same. They are both my sons but... why? Why do you keep on walking the wrong path?"
"He always reminds me of the woman you love," the Queen snapped, finally breaking her silence. "It can\'t be helped. Why must he look just like his mother? His hair, his eyes and everything... it\'s tormenting."
King Regan narrowed his eyes and sighed. "Lorey -"
"You never loved me. I understand that. I know that I\'m paying for what I did but... " Lorey Helev paused and glanced at her husband with her gaze desperate than ever. "It\'s been 13 years, Regan. Why did you still hold that woman in your heart?"
"Arin is innocent. Can\'t you see that?" the King said and took a step closer towards his wife. "You know he still has that hatred in his heart but he never blames Morin. Instead, he loves him and always cares about his happiness. Can\'t you see that?"
King Regan paused and met the Queen\'s gaze. "I\'m the one to blame and not Arin. Now, you even target the Crown Princess. She has nothing to do with this. You should take out your anger on me."
"But I love you. How can I do that?!"
The moment the words escaped her lips, Lorey Helev finds herself so laughable. She was the mighty Princess of Nathania! Why was she always weak in front of this man?!
She was just a naive young Princess when she first met him during her visit to Zoris. Though the King of Qalagon was older by 10 years, it didn\'t stop her from falling for him. She fell for him without even knowing his age or that he was a married man. She was deeply hurt by the revelation and when the only chance to make him hers arrived, her darkened side won and she made a decision which she shouldn\'t.
Since then, she was slowly swallowed by darkness and she couldn\'t break free from it. Hatred and jealousy became a part of her everyday life. She knew it was her fault. She destroyed her own life but... she just can\'t accept it.
"I know it\'s my fault but you\'re not innocent either. You are the one who turned me into a bitter woman," Queen Lorey said to her husband without even blinking an eye.
"I know but... please stop hurting others. I don\'t want to lose my family for the second time and if this goes on, it will be too late to regret it. Don\'t you that Morin will be the one to suffer the most if that happens?" King Regan uttered. His gaze softened a bit and he was now giving his wife a pleading look. He truly wanted to make this work!
The Queen fell silent when she glanced at her husband. She couldn\'t take such a desperate and pleading look, especially from him. Once again, she felt weak and helpless.
"It\'s already too late," she barely muttered after what seemed to be forever. "Many things happened and it\'s unsolvable now."
"No," the King firmly protested. "Do you know why I waited and feigned ignorance all those years? It\'s because I believe that you will change your way. I never lose hope in you, Lorey. You wouldn\'t want to hurt Morin. I believe that you are still the pure-hearted Princess I first met in Zoris."
He trusted her? Queen Lorey felt tight-lipped!
"I -I..." She struggled for words to say though she truly wished to say something. Even after many years, Regan Helev was the only one who could make her heart wavered though she never received his love and... she hated that.
Staring at her troubled face, King Regan took a deep breath and slowly walked towards her. Then he pulled her in and embraced her. "I\'m sorry. I should have been more considerate of your feelings."
Queen Lorey Helev was taken aback by his words and action. Was this real?
King Regan shut his eyes as he caressed the back of her head. He knew that what she always wanted the most was his love and attention. She was younger and she longed to be loved. He knew all along but... it\'s not like he could control his heart. He was the King and he was always busy to the point where she felt neglected. He knew all that.
"I\'ll try harder," he said as he opened his eyes. Then he pulled back and narrowed his gaze at her. "Please be patient with me for another while. I will give my all to make it up to you. I don\'t want you to lose yourself forever."
Standing outside the tent with a seemingly blank face was Crown Prince Arin. Then he narrowed his eyes at the ground.
He followed the King and Queen right after the archery competition ended because he wanted to talk with them about what happened but... after listening to his father\'s words, he wasn\'t sure of what to do anymore.....